How Toone is navigating grief through football
How Toone is navigating grief through football
How Toone is navigating grief through – Ella Toone’s journey as a professional footballer has taken on a new dimension since the passing of her father, Nick. This summer, the England and Manchester United midfielder will stand at the altar, but one seat will remain empty—reserved for the man who shaped her career and inspired her every step of the way. The 26-year-old has shared how she channels her sorrow into her sport, honoring Nick’s memory while carrying forward his legacy as a trailblazer for women’s football.
The Documentary
A new BBC documentary, *24 Hours with Ella Toone*, offers an intimate glimpse into her emotional landscape and how she balances personal loss with professional demands. Through candid interviews and behind-the-scenes footage, the film captures her resolve to keep moving forward, even as she grapples with the absence of her father. Toone reflects on the ways Nick was a constant presence in her life, both on and off the pitch, and how his passing has reshaped her perspective on success and sacrifice.
A Father’s Influence
From an early age, Nick Toone was more than a parent—he was a mentor, a supporter, and a visionary. Ella recalls how he treated football as a shared passion, taking her to matches across the country and even abroad for England games. “Our connection was built around the game,” she explains. “He was one of the first to believe in my potential, and that belief kept me going when the odds seemed stacked against me.” His dedication extended beyond the field, as he would watch every game on television, replaying highlights to prepare for discussions with his daughter. “He loved women’s football more than men’s,” she says. “It was his obsession, and I was the center of it.”
“He was just obsessed. He loved women’s football more than he loved watching the men’s game. He knew all the players, he was passionate about where I was in my career, the team I had, the way we were playing.”
His enthusiasm was contagious, often drawing curious glances in pubs where he’d passionately debate tactics and player performances. “He would go into any pub and talk about women’s football and me,” Ella shares. “That was his way of making sure the world knew what he believed in.” This unwavering support helped her navigate the pressures of professional sports, though the loss of Nick has tested her in ways she never anticipated.
News of the Diagnosis
On the day Ella scored in England’s 2-1 victory over Germany in the 2022 European Championship final, she had no idea her father was facing a life-changing diagnosis. Nick had shared the news with his wife, Karen, and brother, but not with Ella—until the tournament’s final moments. “He wasn’t well throughout the tournament,” she reveals. “I’m finding out more about it now that he’s not here.” The revelation hit her hard, especially after the emotional high of the match. It wasn’t until May 2024, following Manchester United’s FA Cup triumph, that she fully processed the depth of his illness.
His death three days before his 60th birthday, in September 2024, came as a profound shock. Ella returned to training the very next day, driven by a promise to her father. “I knew that’s what he would have wanted,” she says. “I started the first game at Old Trafford, and it was really difficult, but I felt like that’s what I needed to do in that moment.” She describes the pressure she felt to perform, as if each goal would be a tribute to Nick’s enduring presence.
“Every goal I score now, I dedicate to dad. But that just felt like a relief. The first few months of playing, I was putting so much pressure on myself. I wanted to score for him. I wasn’t letting myself relax and enjoy the game.”
A Break Through Injury
It was a calf injury in November 2024 that forced Ella to step back from the sport she had always relied on for solace. The pause allowed her to reflect and process her grief in a way she hadn’t before. “I think it was my body telling me to stop before I would have had a mental breakdown,” she recalls. During her two-month break, she spent time with a counsellor and took a holiday in Dubai, finding clarity in the quiet.
When she returned to action, the moment was bittersweet. Manchester United’s 7-0 FA Cup victory over West Brom in January 2024 marked her comeback, and she scored a spectacular long-range strike. “It was decent, but later voted our team’s goal of the season,” she notes. The act of pointing to the sky during the goal became a silent homage to her father, a gesture that symbolized her determination to keep playing despite the pain of his absence.
Legacy and New Beginnings
Ella’s father’s legacy is now a driving force for the next generation of women’s footballers. She describes him as “the most competitive person ever,” and his belief in her talent has become a beacon for others. “He was a pioneer for women’s football, and his influence is still felt today,” she says. His absence has only deepened her commitment to representing the sport with passion and purpose.
Meanwhile, Ella’s fiancé, Joe Bunney, has taken on a pivotal role in her life. He was not only a steadfast support system for her family during Nick’s illness but also a partner in her emotional recovery. Bunney, who once faced his own challenges after a car crash in 2019 derailed his Bolton Wanderers career, has since channeled his grief into creating a girls’ football academy—Nick’s lifelong dream. “He was my bestie,” Bunney says. “Without him, I’d have lost direction.” Together, Ella and Joe are ensuring that Nick’s vision lives on, both on and off the pitch.
Processing Grief
Ella admits that the initial weeks after Nick’s death were filled with confusion and sorrow. The routine of matchdays, once a shared experience with her father, now felt like a reminder of his absence. “It was hard for my family to watch me play because it was their time with dad,” she says. This realization has helped her understand how deeply his loss has affected not just her, but the people around her.
Yet, in the midst of grief, she has found strength. The act of returning to football has become a way to honor Nick’s memory, transforming her pain into purpose. “I needed to play, I couldn’t just be sitting around moping,” she says. “I knew he would have been there, cheering me on.” His absence is a constant presence, but Ella has learned to carry his spirit with her, turning every game into a tribute.
As she prepares for her wedding, the empty chair at the altar serves as a powerful symbol of resilience. The story of Nick Toone is not just one of loss but of legacy—a reminder that his influence on her career will echo beyond the field. For Ella, football is more than a sport; it’s a lifeline, a connection to the man who believed in her before anyone else did. And as she continues to play, she ensures that his passion for the game will never be forgotten.
In the end, Ella’s journey is a testament to how grief can be transformed into motivation. Through her dedication to the sport and her father’s enduring impact, she is proving that even in the face of loss, the game can be a source of strength and hope. Her story is one of perseverance, a powerful narrative that resonates with anyone who has ever sought to honor a loved one through their own endeavors.